8 Ways NOT to Grow Your Company

An irreverent guide from Corey Blake, publisher of CC Press

In this fast-paced, digital environment, buzzwords and marketing “trends” to make you more money seem to be taking the business world by storm with promises for things like “growth” and “opportunity.”

But why should we work so hard for something with such an unknown outcome? How about we forget what it is we need to do and get back to the status quo, shall we?

Want to remain in the land of status quo? Here are some tips that are sure to keep you firmly planted in the “safe” zone for as long as possible:

1. The Strategy of Hope.

When you use hope as a strategy, it’s like gambling. And who doesn’t LOVE gambling? The hope-as-a-strategy approach also means no accountability when the strategy fails; which gives you the right to yell at everybody. #winning

2. Purpose Loophole.

Make “making money” your purpose. Boom. Done. Then, tell people you’re a purpose-driven business and keep those hippies off your back.

3. Play More Games.

We all know #winning is awesome. It’s also defined by making sure someone near you is NOT winning. Creating more losers around you betters your odds of being top dog.

4. Dumb it Down.

We all know that ping pong tables and free coffee aren’t enough to keep employees happy. But who has the right to complain when they’ve got a paddle in one hand and a sweet mocha java in the other? As long as their guilt overrides their lack of joy, you’ll still be winning (see #3 above).

Photo by Leonard Ortiz, Orange County Register/SCNG

5. Go Medieval.

Why do you think moats and castles on hills were the preferred location of Kings? Because isolation equals safety. When you prefer to be outstanding—and all alone—you (literally) set yourself apart from competitors.

6. Slay the Beastliest Beast.

Every day, go out there and look for the biggest, most successful company you can find, covertly lure them into a distracting, unrelenting frenzy of social media chaos, and take their business down. The bigger the takedown, the greater your digital legacy.

7. Be the Mean Boyfriend.

We’ve all heard this cliché. But clichés become clichés because they speak the truth. Employees like to be treated badly. And heck, if you break them down spiritually, where else are they going to go?

8. Are You Ringling Bros. or Barnum and Bailey?

Who cares. The point is, it’s your circus, and those are your performers. It doesn’t matter how many of them would follow you into the unknown and which might jump ship; and you shouldn’t bother finding out. This consciousness stuff sounds adorable, but how about you DON’T poke the bear in the eye, k?

If you’ve gotten this far and are feeling like you’d rather take the high road in developing your strengths as a Conscious Leader, click here to download our authentic and heartfelt guide: 4 Keys to Jump-Start Your Growth as a Conscious Capitalist.

Claim your role in using business as a force for good—to elevate all of humanity. Download this free three-page guide to start your journey. In it, you’ll learn:

  • The key commitments you need to make when embarking on your Conscious Capitalist Journey
  • The four tenets of Conscious Capitalism that serve as guideposts for anybody on this journey
  • The importance of finding good leaders to learn from, spreading the word, and walking the talk

Get 4 Keys to Jump-Start Growth as a Conscious Capitalist